Red Baron Pizza

Red Baron Pizza-

I hope your crash you prop-plane into a mountain you mustachioed son of a bitch. Here is what The Baron has done. When I was a child Red Baron pizza used to make and sell Breakfast Pizzas. Legitimately good pizzas that tasted great from either the Microwave or Oven, it didn’t matter. What were these pizzas composed of that made them so delicious? Imagine a pizza crust made of biscuit (a wonderful foundation). A thin “sauce” of white gravy went on top of that, covered with egg, mozzarella cheese (not cheddar), and your choice of sausage or bacon. As a young lad, you couldn’t swing a dead midget in freezer aisle without hitting a Red Baron breakfast pizza, but not now. I have not been able to find one damn breakfast pizza at any Waco HEB or Wal-Mart. I thought that perhaps it was another one of Waco’s great social blunders (similar to one-way streets or parking garages with steeples), but upon coming back to Oklahoma City, I’ve found there are no RB breakfast pizzas here either. My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?

Advertisements

18 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Haley on May 30, 2008 at 11:05 am

    This is the funniest thing I’ve ever read. I forwarded it to several people. You’ll be famous in a matter of hours… hours Riley hours… then you can afford that Bacon of the Month Club membership (with complimentary pig snout).

    Reply

    • Posted by toy on January 24, 2012 at 11:14 am

      I have been able to find only the 3 pack mini scrambles at the strangest place, $DOLLAR TREE$; the ones with the freezer section, Charlotte, NC

      Reply

  2. Posted by aaron on July 29, 2008 at 9:56 pm

    ive found myself in a similar predicament having been looking for the same style of breakfast pizza of which you speak.. i think my mom used to buy them at sams club.. i havent been in a while, but its worth a shot.. ive also heard there is a gas station on herring and 18th or so that has a similar pit.. good loch and God speed.. may He restore Himself as a faithful breakfast pizza provider for you once more

    Reply

  3. look beyond your nose. Go to the Red Baron web page find answers there. Red Baron Tonys, Freshetta all the same company. Breakfast Pizzas can be found in many many stores.

    Reply

  4. Posted by Jess on November 21, 2008 at 10:36 am

    They sell Red Baron breakfast pizzas here in TN. Only Kroger sells them though. Walmart stopped selling them a few years ago.

    Reply

  5. Posted by Carolyn on January 4, 2009 at 9:26 am

    Schwan’s sells them.

    Reply

  6. Posted by michael on March 18, 2009 at 11:49 am

    i have an unlimited supply of Red Baron breakfast pizzas. I won a contest on the radio 6 months back and i have my deep freezer stocked with tons of them. i am willing to auction some off at unbeatable prices.

    Reply

  7. Posted by rileye on March 19, 2009 at 10:09 pm

    That sounds like unlimited supply of “the runs.” Congratulations. If you need to sell those pizzas, hopefully someone will be willing to use this as a venue.

    Reply

  8. Posted by SD on April 21, 2009 at 11:34 am

    Harris Teeter has the red baron breakfast pizzas. I always buy ALL the sausage ones.

    Reply

  9. Posted by John/lifetime pilot on May 5, 2009 at 3:25 pm

    I hope your response was in jest, even then it is not funny. The Red Baron Squadron did lose a team member in an accident. So be careful what you say. It could strike the wrong cord.

    Reply

  10. Posted by dbeach on November 11, 2009 at 10:09 am

    Lightne up John!

    Reply

  11. Posted by dbeach on November 11, 2009 at 10:10 am

    Sorry! I mean lighten. Typos Sock!

    Reply

  12. Posted by Shola on May 15, 2011 at 9:03 am

    I woke up this morning craving one before I even got out of bed. Stayed in my pajamas, went to kroger. Nothing 😦
    It’s ok, I thought, the kroger here usually has a limited selection…. Shall I make the trip to walmart? Do I want them that badly? YES!! it’s only a few miles out. I arrive at walmart, still rubbing the sleep out of my eyes… Hoping hoping hoping….. Nothing 😦

    Reply

  13. The Red Baron Breakfast Pizzas are available in Indiana at Kroger’s, Marsh and Jay C. Unfortunately they recently increased in price to an unacceptable amount. Used to be 3 boxes (of 2 pizza’s each) for $10. Overnight they went to $3.79 per box. While still not exorbitant, it is too much of an overnight increase. Sam’s Club and WalMart do not carry them. I thought I have found them at a restaurant supply, but they stopped carrying them in favor of some other band of 12″ breakfast pizza at 12 (in a box) for $56. I still think the lady was mistaken.

    Reply

  14. Posted by James H. on January 1, 2013 at 3:43 pm

    Used to find them everywhere in Olympia, WA — got them all the time from Safeway and Fred Meyer as a kid and they were everywhere… I hadn’t had one for about 5 years. I had a “breakfast pizza” at a restaurant a few weeks back for like $15 bucks and that triggered a HUGE craving since the damn thing wasn’t as good as the Red Barons I remember. But now I can’t find the damn things at the store — I’ve got an e-mail in to them for a list of stores in the state that they ship to, as well as a list of states where they still ship.

    HOWEVER!

    Red Baron is a Schwan’s Foods company… and Schwan’s delivers all over here. I went to schwans.com and what do I see? Bacon Breakfast Pizza featured on the home page! Looks like Schwan’s still carries the bacon variety (searched and didn’t see sausage or western varieties)–and it looks exactly the same as the Baron… so if I get no love from Red Baron, I’ll order it directly from their head company… they come in packs of 6 for 11.95 from Schwan’s… actually not bad.

    Reply

  15. Posted by James H. on January 1, 2013 at 5:20 pm

    UPDATE:

    I found out that outside of the midwest/south, you can find them at United Grocers (formerly “AG”) stores! These are primarily smaller/mid-sized 1-5 store local chains that have the “Western Family” (west coast) or “SureFine” (everywhere else) store brand products. AG used to prominently display their logo on all ads of the stores that they serviced–when United Grocers bought them out they stopped this–but if you remember seeing the “AG” logo on any ads (or they carry the store brands mentioned above) chances are the breakfast pizzas you seek will be found there or can be ordered for you!

    Just picked up 6 boxes at Ralph’s/Bayview Thriftway in Olympia, WA… they were on sale for $2.50 per box!

    Reply

  16. you are ALL RETARDED…the breakfast pizza is still being made and sold EVERYWHERE with a different name. they are now biscuit style scramblers…same thing…youve all looked past

    Reply

  17. Posted by Kathy on January 8, 2015 at 4:13 am

    You can find them in Milwaukee, WI..at the Roundy’s, You can find them in Westminster SC, at Ingles.. WHY THE HELL CAN”t I FIND THEM IN FAYETTEVILLE NC!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: