Argentina Hair

Men have long hair here. Not “long” as in my brother Ryan, who slightly resembles Anthony Keidis, without a lisp. They have “long” hair as in Vanilla Sky Tom Cruise. It isn’t my intention to use such a trite actor but at least I didn’t say Mission Impossible II or III. If they don’t have long hair then it is generally medium length and slicked back. You can tell that many of these porteños channel their Italian ancestry with regards to their personal appearance. People like myself stand out. People like myself? Yes, ogre-ish looking North Americans who are endowed with larger foreheads than the hair to cover them. The other night, after dinner, Los Gallos and Carmen were discussing the phonetic complexity of the name “Riley” to many Latinos. I said, “Well if it is easier for you, you can call me Evan (pronounced Avon)” Tito then said that it that might work because I slightly resemble a Viking. Personally I think I look like a great big Scotsman. Country of origin isn’t the point, like I said, ogre-ish is the point; perhaps like Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords, “an ogre who works at the library”.

 
 

One thing that is nice about my appearance and Buenos Aires may be that this society has no problem with chest hair. People have it and they have no problem showing it. That is why, my friends, I am walking around with my shirt one button lower. I might not be able to compete with the long cranial locks of my Argentine brethren but I can certainly flaunt some shag on my Big-Viking Chest. At the very least it might garner me some sympathy-respect when I flub up a Spanish word. I can’t determine if shoulder hair is in vogue as much (everyone is wearing winter jackets in this blistering cold 59°F) but at the first sign I’m cutting all my shirts into a reverse V-Neck. Now that I’ve engrained that image into your retinas, I will leave you all. I’ll try to check in with more observations soon.

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